Cats - It's Like Singin' in the Rain, but Everyone Is a Cat. Also It Sucks.

Written by: T.S. Eliot, Lee Hall, Tom Hooper, Andrew Lloyd Webber
Directed by: Tom Hooper
Starring: Francesca Hayward, Robbie Fairchild, Judi Dench, Ian McKellan, Idris Elba, James Corden, Rebel Wilson, Jason Derulo, Jennifer Hudson, Taylor Swift
Budget: $90,000,000

Imagine, if you will, being kidnapped on a stereotypical dark and stormy night, where rain assaults the pavement, and you're tossed into a burlap sack and thrown into the backseat of a car. The car drives for awhile; how many miles or how many hours, you're not really sure, you're in such a daze. It finally skids to a halt and you get tossed out onto the concrete. You emerge from the sack and look out into the most desolate city alleyway you've ever seen, dimly lit only by the dingiest of street lamps - and what appear to be eyes, glowing in the distance, watching you. You're scared, you're wet, you're weak, you're alone - and then a hand reaches out of the distance and you hear a voice that asks: "Would you like to watch me make the Jellicle choice?"

Horror Movies in 2019 - Sophomore Slumps and Murdering Chumps

Your body isn't elastic enough to receive the amount of Blumhouse that's about to be crammed into it.

The Devil Inside

Tired of found footage? Tired of exorcisms? I’ve got just the movie for you. 

Titans - A Preemptive Disappointed Shaking of the Head

DC Universe and DC Comics made headlines on Thursday, but not the good kind like you want.

Harlan Ellison - A Voice from the Edge Gone Silent

Harlan Ellison died yesterday, peacefully, in his sleep, at the age of 84 - one of the few things he's done peacefully in his 70+ years of working, writing, and living. Harlan was one of the great men of our time, often characterized as "the dark prince of American letters" and "the most contentious man in America". He was no stranger to controversy - often inviting it in like a family welcomes its cousins in at Thanksgiving, only more frequently - and was as well-known for his excellent short stories as he was for his explosive temper. Harlan was one of my idols, right up there with Frank Zappa, Bruce Lee, my father, etc. I'm going to tell you as much about him as I can until grief stays my hand.

Dragon Ball Z: Dead Zone

It's time to Rock the Dragon.

Jesus Christ Superstar - The First Movie to Feature Twerking

Written by: Melvyn Bragg, Norman Jewison, Tim Rice, Matthew, Mark, Luke, John
Directed by: Norman Jewison
Music by: Tim Rice, Andrew Lloyd Webber
Starring: Ted Neeley, Yvonne Elliman, Carl Anderson, Barry Dennen, Philip Toubus, the principal from Billy Madison
Cinematography: Douglas Slocombe
Are we still giving credit to huge movie studios that don't love us back?: Universal Pictures

There is no great shortage of biblical film adaptations; it's called the greatest story ever told for a reason. There are varying degrees of success here; one can quickly point to either version of The Ten Commandments or Ben-Hur as useful and worthwhile works of art, while Wholly Moses! and Noah's Ark are wastes of time. It's a tricky balancing act; you've got to respect both the belief system that's been around for a couple millennia lest you upset one of the biggest religious movements in the world, but you've got to commit to the art form as well lest you disappoint the general moviegoer. Right about the 1970s, Tim Rice and Andrew Lloyd Webber had a really bright idea: how about a musical that portrays Jesus Christ as some sort of funk rock superstar?